I came in through the front door. Before I could even open my mouth, Maddy was standing in front of me. "Shhh!! Grandma's sleeping!" she whispered.
Maddy led me into the playroom, just itching to show me the latest masterpiece constructed of legos. "Very impressive, Sweetie. So, how was your day today?"
"Good," she replied. She looked thoughtful for a moment. "Mommy, can I ask you something?"
"Sure, Honey. Anything."
"Why doesn't Taylor baby-sit me anymore? I like him. He's fun."
"Well, Taylor's a busy man..."
"And I like him, Mommy."
"I know you do, but..."
"Do you like him, Mommy?" "Yes, Sweetie, but you see..."
"Because he likes you."
I paused at that one.
"He does. Really. He brought you a present today and everything."
"A present?" I asked.
She nodded her head yes, then ran out of the room. She returned with something in her hand. She gave it to me.
I took it from her and looked at it. A wave of mixed emotions rushed over me as I stared at the case. I was happy and sad at the sight of it. The fact that he kept it, in one piece no less, made me glow. But he had given it back. What was he saying? Was it really and truly over? For good?
After dinner I sat in my room, attempting to complete my final lesson plan. The silence was making me fidget. Finally, I couldn't stand it any longer. I put in Elton John's Love Songs in the CD player.
Funny. I didn't realize how much I missed the CD until I had it back. The same went for Taylor. Well, not exactly. That's how I felt when I saw him in the supermarket parking lot. But as for now, not being with him was killing me. But I had flown off the handle. At the time, it felt so right. I know there were SOME truths to the words I had spoken, but I had been too harsh.
I remember the gleam in Taylor's eyes as he pushed Maddy on the swing. He had changed. It was behind his eyes, but I was afraid to acknowledge it. And sadly enough, it was for selfish reasons. I was afraid of being close to someone again, of him deciding I wasn't THE ONE, and there's only so much heartache I can stand.
The CD approached the end, the third to last song filling the air. I had always brushed this song off, usually skipping over it. It never received airplay from the radio because it was never released as a single. I closed my eyes and listened to Elton this time, though.
I can feel time closing in... I can feel the years crawling through my skin... And if I doubt myself, I can count on the rain to cover the tears of this aging game...
I looked through the CD booklet. This song, "You Can Make History (Young Again)," had been written before I'd even HEARD the name Taylor Hanson. It seemed pretty unbelievable considering it described our relationship blow-by-blow, at least since my return to Tulsa. I felt the tears well up in my eyes, and as the bridge was sung they spilled over.
Ancient minds, ancient lives got a way of comin' round... If I knew then what I know now, I'd find a way back, back in time... I'd make it back to you somehow...
That was all I needed to hear. I knew what I had to do. I was taking a chance, but it was possibly the last one for Taylor and I. I grabbed my purse and car keys, and ran down the stairs.
I knocked on the door. No answer. I knocked again, louder. Still no answer. Just as I was about to knock a third time, the door swung open. Taylor opened his mouth to speak, but I silenced him with a deep, passionate kiss. I backed us up into his apartment, kicking the door shut on my way in.