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Confessions
Part II
These are my confessions |
"Hmmm…" I sighed snuggling just that much closer to Taylor. "I would crawl under your skin if I could."
"God, that sounds sexy," Taylor mumbled into my hair.
"It would feel like nothing else on Earth." I said rubbing his chest as it heaved under my hand. I found it so interesting that he could be on stage for two hours jumping around and barely be breathing heavy. And yet, half an hour of wrestling in a hotel room bed left him breathless, his heart pounding wildly in his chest. I stretched out full length, loving the feeling of flesh on flesh, the feeling of my heart beating in time with his.
"Oh, it does…" Taylor answered his voice a whisper in the darkness. "Crawling inside you, living just under the surface of your skin…"
"Hmmm…" I sighed lowering my head back onto his shoulder. The show had been amazing, full of energy and surprises. Taylor had sung a song I hadn't heard in years, his dedication to me made me blush like a giddy schoolgirl. Zac had been wild hanging from the light riggings at one time and causing Diana to gasp as he fell to the stage. Isaac had played a guitar solo for the ages. It was memorable and one of a kind and really, as special as any other show. I had spent the first part of the show following Annabelle around making sure that she didn't agree to follow some nice, well-meaning stranger back to their seat. Having the whole family there had been fun and nice. During the second half, I even got the opportunity to work the merchandise booth with Anne for a while.
"You know, this is my favorite thing." Taylor said wrapping his arms around me.
"Sex?" I asked surprised, but then again not surprised at all.
"Well, that is one of my favorite things." He said chuckling. "But I love this. I love laying in bed with you, talking, being close…"
"I love it too." I said sighing. The soft whirring of the air conditioner was all I could hear. It was a little disconcerting to not hear the soft mumbling and teeth grinding of Annabelle, but tonight she had been bound and determined to sleep with Zoë. So, we let her.
"The room is so quiet." Taylor said as if reading my thoughts. "How hard do you think it's going to be to get her to sleep in her own room when we get done with this tour?"
"Well, if we appeal to her pride, not too hard." I answered.
"Very true." Taylor said quietly. "So, how much do you think a little brother is going to disrupt her life?"
"Honest?" I asked. I felt him shrug underneath me. "I think that a little brother OR sister will completely throw her life into a tailspin for a while. But I also think that if we play her right… She'll think it's her idea."
"You know, she is so smart it is scary." Taylor said quietly. "A lot like you… So, you're sure about another baby?"
"I think so." I said shrugging.
"You think so?" He said laughing. "Well, we just had unprotected sex and we know it only takes one time so, you'd better be sure."
"I know, I know." I answered feeling a sudden flush come over me. It was the same emotional flush that I felt in New York when Annabelle was conceived. The idea that I could be incubating another very new little life inside of me suddenly felt hugely overwhelming. Some days I didn't feel up to the task of Annabelle, how was I going to handle another baby? "Tay does it make me a bad mom cause I worry about another baby..."
"What? Why?" Taylor asked hugging me tightly against his chest. "You don't want another one?"
The New Year's Eve party was in full swing. The canvas tent was set up around the swimming pool with a band playing something loud and raucous. I could hear lots of laughter and the distinctive clinking of bottles and glasses. Diana and Walker throw the best New Year's parties and have all my life. Normally, I'd be out in the tent breathing in the highly chlorinated and steamy air while shaking my booty, but this year, I was in exile.
I was roughly the size of a barge. I was so, so pregnant. And I wasn't one of those delicately pregnant women who just had a little belly and complained about how huge they are. I was just huge. I was pregnant all over my body. My dad had even commented on the fact that I had gained a lot of weight. A comment that had made me cry for about three hours.
And all evening the baby had been dancing some sort of mambo on my bladder while pressing as hard as she could against my back. My back had been hurting so badly that I had retreated back into the house after standing around for only about fifteen minutes. I ended up sitting in the family room just hearing the party. Anyway, the little kids were all in here watching a movie so, I volunteered to stay and control the crazies. And as midnight drew closer, the kids could all feel that the fireworks were coming.
I was squirming trying desperately to find a position that the baby didn't find objectionable. My back was aching, the skin on my tummy was hard and itchy, I felt like I needed to pee, again. In short, I just couldn't get comfortable. I closed my eyes for a moment dreaming about a day when I would be able to relax again. As I drifted, I noticed the noise from outside had amplified. It was 11:55, time for the crazies to go out for the fireworks. "Hey, guys. It's time for the fireworks!"
A general cheer went up amongst the kids before they went tearing out of the room. I lay back, my eyes closed. I felt just plain awful. I heard the sliding glass door open. I opened an eye and saw Taylor standing in front of me. "Hey baby."
"Hey," he said swaying slightly. He'd definitely had more than just a little bit to drink. I wouldn't say he was drop-dead drunk. But he was highly tipsy.
"How's the party?" I asked smiling as he swayed.
"It's okay, but I missed you. So, how're you feeling?" Taylor asked as he settled onto the floor in front of me. He leaned back against me, he felt warm and smelled beery.
"I'm okay," I said shifting slightly.
"How is our baby?" Taylor asked his hand moving over my belly. At his voice, she began to turn somersaults. She never failed to perform for her daddy even before her birth. "Hey Annabelle Beatrice, when do I get to see you? When are coming out?"
"Not soon enough," I sighed. My tummy tightened.
“Don’t rush things.” He said leaning forward to kiss me. As our lips connected, I saw rainbows of blue and red painted against my eyelids. The fireworks had begun. “Happy New Year, baby.”
“Happy New Year,” I said struggling to sit up. “Tay, help me.”
“Okay,” he said dragging himself to his feet.
He grabbed both my hands and started to pull. As I started to get upright, suddenly, I heard a strange tearing sound before water came gushing out of me. “Oh my God.”
“What?” Taylor asked.
“Either my water just broke or I peed my pants.”
“Your water broke?” I just nodded my head. He let go of my hands and I fell unceremoniously back onto the couch, landing squarely in the puddle of amniotic fluid. “Oh my God. Oh my God!” He ran over and yanked the sliding glass door open. “Mom! Mom!!”
“Cleo?” Taylor said gently squeezing my shoulder. “Are you in there?”
“What?” I said shaking my head, chasing the memory of Belle’s very exciting arrival back. “What did you ask me?”
“I asked you if you really wanted another baby.” Taylor said softly.
"Oh! Absolutely I do want another… It's just I don't know how much more love I can handle." I said feeling tears catch in my throat. "I love Belle so much it makes me physically ache. I mean, I fell in love with you and you made me feel whole for the first time... Well, ever. You loved me despite me, for want of a better expression. And I learned to love you more and better than anyone in the world. Then, you gave me the greatest gift I've ever received. You gave me Annabelle. And when she popped out squalling and angry, I wanted to cry. Not because of pain or injury, but with joy. I cried and cried... I was sure I would never be able to stop."
"I remember," he said smoothing down her hair. "I know for sure that I cried more that day than I ever had before. And maybe ever."
"Well, sometimes when I look at her, it's all I can do to keep from crying." I said feeling the familiar well burning behind my eyes. "Will I be able to love someone else that much? What will I do with two angels to love like that? How will I function crying like a fool all day long?" He had begun to chuckle softly. "Don't laugh, I worry about these things!"
He laughed at my last remark, a full-blown belly laugh with the accompanying tears and everything. Soon, he had me hugged tightly to him, rocking me back and forth. "Cleo, you have no idea how much I love you."
"Actually, I think I do." I said laying my head on his chest. His soft chuckles were comforting rumbles from deep in his chest. Suddenly, I felt this intense desire to hear him sing to me. I needed to hear his voice and I wanted it to be just for me. "Will you sing to me?"
"Sing to you?" He asked. "What do you want me to sing?"
"I don't know, surprise me." I whispered into the dark.
"You want me to sing, now?" He asked. "Hmm… Okay, but what's in it for me?"
"Well, I can think of lots of ways to thank you." I said sliding my leg between his then sliding my knee up. He sucked in his breath softly. "Unless you're not up for it…"
"Oh, I don't think that will be a problem." He kissed me on top of my head. He began humming something slow and quiet. He took a breath to sing when there was a quiet, insistent knocking on the door. "Damn, who's that?"
"Ignore it," I said sliding my hand down his belly. "They'll leave."
"Okay," Taylor said kissing me, but the knocking continued. It even got a little bit louder. "Maybe I should at least see who it is."
"No," I said crawling on top of him. I was straddling him. I wasn't playing at all. "They will leave and I want to have sex. We have to make a baby!"
"Dang, forceful!" Taylor said giving in as the knocking stopped momentarily. "I think I like this side of you…"
"Get used to…" I started.
"Tay, Cleo, I can hear you." Zac said through the door. I leaned my head against Taylor's chest. There was a semi-hysterical tone to his voice. "Dude, I really, really need to talk to you."
"Fine," Taylor called as he struggled to extricate himself from the blankets and me. I flipped on the light as he began rummaging through the clothing we had quickly discarded. He finally found his jeans that he had worn during the show. He turned and looked at me as he did up his pants. "Hold on, let me get something on."
"Thanks," Zac said. If I didn't know better, I would have guessed he was crying.
“Get rid of him fast!” I mouthed as Taylor ran his fingers through his hair.
“I will,” he said grabbing the handle of the door. He looked so sexy and rumpled standing there. Taylor yanked the door open, exposing a very bereft looking Zac. Taylor tried to stand in the doorway blocking Zac's way into the room.
Zac just powered his way past Taylor anyway. His eyes stopped on me momentarily, but didn't seem to register anything at all. I was shocked that he didn't have anything to say about my state of undress. He sniffed and pulled a face. "I hope I wasn't interrupting anything."
Ah, there was the smart-ass remark I had been expecting, but not.
"Actually…" I began, but as Zac sank onto the bed across from me, I was pretty sure the joke was about to be lost on him. He looked beyond sad; he looked inconsolable. He really didn't look like someone prepared to trade jabs. For lack of a better metaphor, he looked like someone had just run over his puppy. He was compulsively clutching something in his left hand. He lowered his head looking at his feet. "We were asleep, that's what took so long."
"Zac, what's up?" Taylor asked as he settled on the bed next to me. His hand slid over my hip, his eyes locked onto mine, a small smile just for me. He obviously hadn't noticed how upset Zac looked.
"Tay, I really need some advice." Zac whispered before finally looking up at Taylor. The tears standing in his eyes were huge. He opened his mouth to say something, but the words didn't come. He stopped and took a deep breath. "Tay, everything is so fucked up..."
"Did you and Anne fight?" Taylor asked noticing for the first time how upset Zac was.
"No," Zac said mournfully. "Not yet..."
"Well, what's wrong?" Tay asked again.
"Everything, just everything." Zac said his voice soft and defeated.
"Well, you obviously came here to talk…" Taylor began.
"Tay, what if I told you that I had just found something out that will change my life irrevocably." Zac began his voice catching deep in his chest. "It will change my life if I do something and if I don't… The sick thing is that it will change your life and Ike's life too. If I do what the world would consider the right thing…"
"Well, of course, you need to do the right thing. We'll deal with whatever comes up." Taylor said shrugging. My sweet Taylor always so sure that the "right thing" is the answer. He was so sure that the world was full of black and white options. I mean, he's not a simpleton and thinks that everything is either/or. But on questions of moral choices, he thought right and wrong were pretty obvious. "Why would you even question that?"
"But I'm not sure it's what I want to do." Zac said frustration in his voice. "I'm afraid of what it means…"
"Well, what's going on?" Taylor asked.
"What is going on is that my life is about to come to a screeching halt." Zac said tears in his voice. "I just don't know what to do."
"Well, Zac, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong." Taylor said quietly. I could see that Taylor was seriously getting worried. "Maybe you need to go talk to Dad…"
"No!" Zac said standing halfway up. His eyes were huge and dilated. Whatever was wrong was seriously scaring him. "No, I can't. Not yet. And I may not even ever have to tell him."
"Okay, but really, I can't tell you what to do. Especially since I have no clue what your moral dilemma is."
“Maybe that’s it!” Zac said a light shining in his eyes. He started for the door. “If I do nothing, then it will all go away…”
“You know that’s not true,” Taylor said watching Zac closely. He had taken two steps towards the door, but stopped when Taylor started talking. He stopped and rubbed his hand roughly over his face, before turning back towards us. “You know that things never just go away. They always come back and bite you on the ass at the strangest times.”
“I know,” Zac said chuckling sardonically as he settled back down onto the bed. His shoulders dropped. He looked as tired and sad as I've ever seen him. The silence stretched out longer and longer, until finally Zac held out his hand. His strong hand was shaking as he opened it to reveal what he held; in his hand was the letter the fan had given me earlier. "Just read this."
"Okay," Taylor said taking the crumpled envelop. The letter had fallen out of my pocket during my nap with Annabelle. After the show, Emory had found it and given it to him. He had shoved it in his pocket saying he'd read it later. But apparently something in the letter had really upset Zac. Taylor unfolded the letter and placed it on his leg. I sat up and placed my chin on his shoulder, reading the messy scrawl.
Zac,
Hey, it's me, Symphony. I know I promised you that what happened in LA would die with me. And it will. We had fun and isn't that the important thing? I guess the ending wasn't as much fun for you as the rest, but… Maybe some day we can do it again. But then again, I heard you were back with your girlfriend. I know you love her, so I’m happy for both of you. And really our few weeks together were fun and educational… I was glad to see that your brothers didn’t kill you. Even though you were so sure they would. I was also really glad to see that you didn’t end up in the tabloids.
You once told me that I reminded you of the girl you love. But I totally don’t believe a word of that. I was someone from the faceless crowd that caught your attention. I don’t know what it was that made you say that to me, but for that I thank you. You made me feel like a whole lot more than just another pussy. And really, Loveboat is one lucky girl. And I know that you really do love her despite some of your more questionable actions. And I really, really hate that what I’m writing to you about may come between you two. I know that you’ve paid your penance for any dalliance you may have gotten involved in. And as you yourself said on more than one occasion, sex is just sex. And really, I knew from the beginning that I was just another notch to add to your belt or whatever it is that you rockstar types do. And I was ready willing and able to play whatever game it was that you wanted to play. And I hope that when you get married, you will be as happy as your brothers. I really, really do.
By now, you’re probably going “why in the hell would Symphony write me a letter?” I’m wondering the same thing. I’m sitting in this coffee shop, smoking too many cigarettes and wondering if this is the right thing to do. Should I give this to you? Should I just rip it up and forget it? And really, would I be allowed to get within 500 yards of you? I honestly think if you saw my face, you’d turn and run the other way. But maybe not. I’ll never know. I'm not contacting you for anything. Not really. In fact, I almost didn't contact you, but there are things going on that you do deserve to know. Even though you told me you were morally bankrupt, I didn’t believe you. You really do have a strong goodness deep down in your soul, even if you have a deviant streak a mile wide. You are a good guy, a really good guy. And after listening to you go on and on about how much you love and adore your family and your niece, I figured this was something I needed to tell you. Actually, I thought you would want to know…
So, here goes nothing… Zac, I'm pregnant. And you know it's yours just as surely as I do. The reason why I'm writing you is because I decided to give you the opportunity to have it if you want it. The world is filled with schmucks who wouldn’t give a rat’s ass about the baby of a girl they hardly know. But I know that’s not your style. You are one of the good ones. Unfortunately, not my good one. You always have and always will belong to someone else. And really, I always knew that and I don’t have any designs on you. I am going to give this letter to Cleo. After that, you have 72 hours to call me. My number was in your cell phone under Emergencies Only. If you don't call me, I'll keep my appointment with Planned Parenthood.
As you know, I don't want a baby. I don't get people who do. In fact, I don’t get anyone wanting anything to be dependent on them. I don’t even want the responsibility of a plant, much less this unborn child. I want to be able to walk away from any situation. No furniture, no apartment, no ties to hold me down. I know that you said you wanted the same thing out of your life, but somehow I doubt that. And as I called to schedule this abortion, it occurred to me that you might want to know. I remember how lovingly you spoke of your niece. You said that she was a gift… A very spoiled one, but a gift nonetheless. I remember once you told me the greatest things in the world are the unplanned ones. You once said that if some insane fan hadn’t thrown red food coloring all over Cleo or if Cleo and Taylor had been more careful or if everyone had stayed and waited for Cleo to shower that she wouldn’t exist. So, I offer you a gift. An unplanned present all tied up in me.
If you decide you want me to go through with this, I want you to understand that it is yours completely and utterly. I will hand this lump over to you and then I will be gone. You will never hear from me or see me again. This will be yours. I want you to understand that I’m not joking. This will be yours… I left my home when I was 15 to see the world on my own terms. At 18, I’m not about to give up on this. I will sign whatever you want me to saying that I want nothing to do with this child. I will have the baby give him or her to you and then I’ll be gone. Never to be heard from again. And I really wanted to tell you that I don’t want you to go all noble on me and think that I will marry you. That isn’t even a possibility. That isn’t fair to you or me or the baby or your girlfriend.
Of course, that is all a mute point if you don’t contact me. I will know what your decision is. I will go to my appointment on Wednesday morning and it will all be over. And if that is the choice you make, don’t ever feel bad. Sometimes things happen that just can’t be helped and maybe this isn’t the time for this soul. All things renew…
Take care.
Symphony
"Okay," Taylor said finishing the letter. He carefully folded it and placed it back into the grimy envelope. He held it for a few minutes before sighing. "So, it looks like you need to call her."
"I'm not sure I want to." Zac said quietly.
"What? Why not?" Taylor demanded. "It's a baby. It's your baby!"
"I know." Zac said hanging his head.
"But, do you know?" I asked suddenly unable to just sit and listen any longer. "How do you know? This is one of the most famous ruses to get claws into someone famous!"
"Oh, it's mine." Zac said rubbing his face.
“Does it really matter?” Taylor asked. “I mean it’s a baby.”
"How can you be sure?" I demanded sitting up completely ignoring Taylor’s comment.
"Cause I know." He said resting his face in his hands.
"But how?" I asked wishing I were dressed and I could go over and sit next to Zac. The boy was in serious need of some comforting.
"Just cause I do." Zac said shaking his head.
"Anyone can say…" I began.
"Cleo, there was blood, okay?" Zac said his head snapping up. His lip trembled mightily before he could even go on. Tears stood in his eyes, swimming along the edge of his lashes. "And a lot of it. Is that enough evidence?"
"Oh, okay," I said watching Zac closely. He was just defeated. This was not news he wanted or needed. "So, what do you want to do?"
"I don't know." Zac said shrugging. "That is why I'm here."
"There is no question," Taylor said. "You have to call her."
“Okay, say I call her," Zac said his lip trembling, "what do I do then? I can tell you the first thing I'll have to do, figure out how to live without Anne."
"Oh my God," I said my hands flying to my mouth.
"Exactly," Zac said his eyes meeting mine. It was then I realized what I was seeing wasn't necessarily sadness, but abject terror. He really did love Anne and this news would probably spell the end of the entire relationship. "This couldn't be any worse or come at a worse time."
“Zac, it’s a baby, not a decision.” Taylor said.
“But it is a decision,” Zac said quietly.
“What if Cleo and I had decided that wasn’t the right time for a baby and Cleo had aborted Belle?” Taylor asked his voice getting louder.
“Tay, that is so different.” Zac said sighing.
“But it’s not,” Taylor said his voice taking on a strange pleading sound to it.
“It is,” Zac answered. “It is so very different.”
“No, it’s not…” Taylor said jumping up.
“It is,” Zac said pushing Taylor back. “It is very different… Belle didn’t cause you to lose Cleo! Don’t you get this? I will lose Anne over this! This is the rest of my life… The rest of my life!! I don’t want to lose Anne, I just don’t.”
“Are you sure she’ll leave?” Taylor asked.
“Tay, do you have any idea how much begging I had to do to get her back after LA?” Zac asked.
“I know,” I said quietly. I didn’t want to cry, but I knew that Zac had crossed a line in Los Angeles that Anne wasn’t sure she could ever forgive him for. But after lots of begging and many, many promises that what happened in Los Angeles was a memory, she had taken him back. He had given her a ring that was so enormous it was bordering on obscene, but he had given it to her completely humbled and ready to change. Anne would have never considered taking him back if she hadn’t believed he was totally ready to change. “Zac, you can’t lose her… She’s my best friend.”
“Well, I left her laying on my bed watching television. I think I read this letter a thousand times before coming here.” Zac said softly. “And I think that I may go in and sleep in her arms for the last time…”
“Oh Zac,” I said watching the tears begin to slide down his cheeks. I gathered the sheets around me and got out of the bed. I settled onto the bed next to him and he wrapped his arms around me. He was clinging to me like a man who was drowning. I could feel the sobs trapped in his chest, hitching as they tried to come out. “Just let it out…”
“Oh my God…” he cried his tears falling onto my shoulder. “What am I going to do? I can’t lose her.”
“I know baby,” I whispered smoothing back his hair. I felt the bed sink as Taylor sat behind me. I could feel him gathering the sheets and wrapping them around me tighter.
“Zac, you’re right… Belle was never a reason for me to lose Cleo.” Taylor said quietly behind me. “You are in a totally different boat. But, Anne did forgive you for LA. Won’t she forgive you for this too?”
“Tay, another woman is pregnant with my baby, should we ask Cleo how she’d feel about that?” Zac said his voice a sob. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Okay, here’s what you should do,” I said smoothing my hand over his cheek. “Call her…”
“But…” Zac protested.
“No, no but… You call her, tell her to wait a few more days…” I said quietly. I wanted to keep the panic out of my voice. “Buy yourself some thinking time. I mean 72 hours is not long enough. Tell her you need to be able to think. She’s had almost five months to get used to this idea, but you just found out. If you decide not to keep it, you could ask her to have it and give it up for adoption.”
“I just don’t know if I could do that.” Zac said sitting up, his face red and moist, his hair sticking to it in places. He stood and walked over to the window. He pushed the curtain back and looked out onto the dark city. “It’s just that every time I saw a baby, I would wonder if it were mine.”
“But Zac can you in good conscience tell her to not have it when you know how hard Ike and Emory are trying to have one?” Taylor asked. I turned to see the absolute concern etched on his face.
“I know,” Zac said sighing.
“Have you thought about maybe letting Isaac and Emory keep the baby?” Taylor said quietly.
“To be honest,” Zac said softly, “the first thing I thought of wasn’t losing Anne, but of how badly all of this could hurt Isaac. They are trying so hard to have a baby and here I am about to be a father and I don’t want to be one. And really, as far as I’m concerned losing Anne isn’t even an option. Is that bad?”
“No, because losing Anne isn’t an option.” I said tiredly. Zac’s shoulders began to shake with his sobs, his forehead against the window. Taylor stood and walked over to Zac. “Zac, I just don’t think you need to decide right now. Maybe you should sleep on this…”
“Yeah, sleep on it.” Taylor said hugging Zac. “Why don’t you stay in here with us tonight?”
“No, I really want to go and be with Anne.” Zac said pulling back and rubbing the moisture on his face. “I love her. I love her with everything I am. I always have since the first day I saw her in the physical therapists office. She drives me crazy. I can’t do this without her. But when I drop this on her she’s out the door. And pretty much, I’ll never see her again.”
“You don’t know that,” I said settling back onto my bed. “Maybe what we need to do is just really think about exactly how you’re going to break this to her or if you’re even going to need to… You can’t make this decision now, let’s wait until morning when we have more perspective on this situation.”
“Okay,” Zac said sighing heavily. He looked at me and tried to smile, but it just wasn’t working. His eyes were red-rimmed and completely bloodshot.
“Dude, you look like shit,” Taylor said coming back over to our bed. “You really ought to think about staying in here with us.”
“Tay, go and get some ice in a washcloth for Zac’s eyes,” I said winking at him. Taylor walked into the bathroom area. “Zac, if you decide not to call her, I’ll understand.”
“I knew you would,” he said quietly. He sighed deeply as he sank onto the edge of the bed. “I just knew that you would get it when no one else would. And for that I love you.”
“Just for that?” I asked as Taylor came walking back into the room. “I would have thought you loved me for lots of other reasons.”
“I do actually.” Zac said accepting the washcloth filled with ice. “Cleo, I love that you have always been there for me. You have always understood me, got what I was feeling. I mean without your help, I don’t think I would have ever gotten Anne back after the whole LA debacle. And you never judged me or said that you knew I would come to a bad end. And for that, I thank you.”
“Zac, you could never come to a bad end. You are too good of a person. Sometimes, I think you forget that. And I want you to know that I adore you with all that I am and I always want to be there for you,” I said pulling him into a tight hug. He hugged me tightly, his hands going around my back. As he pulled me tight, I could feel his heart beating against my chest and his breath catching. But I could also feel him smile as he rested his head on my shoulder. “I really do love you more than you know. And I will do everything in my power to help you with Anne.”
“You know, you are always skeezing on my woman,” Taylor said settling onto the bed behind me.
“Tay shut up.” I said elbowing him.
“Yeah Tay, shut up!” Zac said putting the ice back on his eyes. “But seriously, you know what I love most?”
“No, what?” I said as I settled back into Taylor’s arms. Taylor instantly spooned in behind me, wrapping me in his strong arms.
Zac lay down next to me, his head on my pillow the ice over his eyes. He sighed thoughtfully. “I love the fact that you’ve been naked at many of my shittiest moments…”
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